Grandpa Lesson 1

“No, that’s mine!” cried the angry voice of my grandson. Parental intervention resolved the earth-shaking battle over the blue Hot Wheels Corvette. Is it possible that the process of differentiation which begins at conception, the journey of separating into an individual has, as one of its necessary steps, the distinguishing of my and mine from that which is yours? Do we need a stage during which we recognize what is ours in order to grow into a mature adult who can be willing to part with, to give away, something of that which is ours? Is it possible that, giving of things is merely a precursor stage to the giving of ourselves to another, to others? Is it possible that the greed and selfishness which I all too often exhibit is a regression or, worse, being stuck in the toddler stage of beginning differentiation? Are all of our thefts, our broken marriages, our corporate greed, our congressional stubbornnesses, our land- and resource-grabbing wars; are all of these a child’s scream of “Mine?” If so, by what means, what magic, what societal growth hormone can we grow into a mature world in which we recognize mine and yours. How can we, ultimately, discover that giving is, indeed, the greatest joy? What would a world be like should we someday discover this most elemental secret of the universe? Can we dream of it even though it seems such a distant, unreachable goal?