Cockroach Dreams

Does a cockroach dream? If so, of what does it dream? Does it dream of money, fame, happiness; a juicier piece of garbage? What are its aspirations; its goals? Does it worry about knowing and following the will of God? Unanswerable questions all; the only communication between us and them is a hostile exchange of heel and avoidance. But the last question intrigues: Does a cockroach know the will of God? Probably not. But one further question: Does it do the will of God? What about a parasite? In their millions, they effect human, animal and plant life profoundly. But even more than a cockroach, their life seems unfocused, without purpose. For example, the lancet fluke of Europe and North America begin as adults in a cow’s stomach. Their eggs pass through the cow’s intestines to be eaten by a snail and hatch within the its intestine. Forming a larva, it bores to the snail’s surface which the snail defends itself from by creating a globule of slime. The slimeball is coughed up by the snail which makes an attractive meal for an ant. The ant is taken over by the fluke larva which controls the ant’s behavior, causing it to move to the top of a stalk of grass in the evening rather than returning to its nest. At the tip of a grass stalk, it is more likely to be eaten by a cow, thus completing the cycle . Where is His purpose, His will, in this bizarre life chain? Not being a biologist, I don’t know if the fluke or the cockroach has a grand purpose in its biological niche or not, so I’m leaving you with an unanswered question, I’m afraid. But in both cases the strange life of the insect or parasite is lived: it does its thing, following the pattern of a myriad of generations before it. “Am I following His will?” Is a question I’ve heard dozens of times within the Christian community. “I need to seek the Lord’s will in this.” “Have you prayed about it?” are variants on the theme. We Christians are prone to this anxious thought and conversation, I believe, because we’re never quite content where we are. Perhaps, as I mentioned in another blog post, we feel like we should be doing some great thing for Him. Perhaps there is a vague itch to be somewhere else and we want to cast the lots of finding His will so we have justification to move somewhere else and to do something else. (Strange it is how often “His will” is a warm sunnier climate—but I digress.) Maybe, though, Jesus was thinking of this propensity of humankind when He said, “Take no thought…” Paul seems to have found the cockroach dream when he said, “in all things and all circumstances I am content.” So, perhaps, His will is not so much a thing to be discovered as a thing to be lived. The ordinary, day-to-day life, lived in Him, is His will. Buying groceries, going to work, changing diapers, talking over the backyard fence, eating dinner—of these mundanities does His will consist. This is not to say that He won’t interrupt and change life’s course, but it’s not a matter of seeking but of being. Said another way: I am in His will unless I consciously leave it in rebellion. Life lived this way seems to me to be more in line with His “rest” than the usual life of a Christian. Faith is falling into and relaxing into Him more than it is a frantic search. Friend, dream the cockroach dream; live the life laid out for you in confidence and contentment: You are in His purpose.